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Theo got his vaccinations today. I, as predicted, got more upset than he did. Not only did the sight of blood dribbling from those chunky thighs get me, but a couple of the things the pediatrician said:

“Is he sleeping through the night?”

Huh? Sleeping through the night at 9 weeks? Is he supposed to? No one told me this! As always, he wakes up every 3 hours—just about on the dot—crying, so I feed him.

“He doesn’t need to eat at night like that.”

Why, why, why haven’t I been told this? Maybe I should go to those f-ing new mother’s group things.

“Tell me about his schedule?”

Schedule? I don’t know. He eats, shits, and sleeps—mostly the two former but in no particular order. In fact, he barely sleeps during the day. He does smile and coo and bat at things, too. Sometimes we both pass out in the green chair at 5 and we wake up during the national news. Is that a schedule?

“He needs two naps a day.”

Does everyone know this stuff but me?

“Is he in the crib?”

Ugh. He loves the swing. I’ve been trying to have him sleep in when it’s not moving to get him used to it. But he does sleep ok in bed with us.

“He needs to be in that crib.”

I cried the whole way home.

Theo slept.
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